I have never enjoyed car shopping. The end result can be rewarding, but the the process as a whole can be tedious at best. I don’t know if the rest of the country is like this, but in Indianapolis you have to be wary of a lot of things when you’re shopping for a used car.
- Did the previous owner have unfulfilled dreams of driving in the biggest race in the country, a scant mile from his childhood home? If so, did he drive his Chevy Aveo as if it were a finely tuned performance machine?
- Is the entire body of the car one harsh winter away from rusting out completely? The cold winter is tough on any vehicle.
- Cost, obviously. I’m pretty sure that everyone has that problem, though.
So what’s to be done? If a “spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down,” as they say, then what would be the spoonful of sugar to my used car buying endeavor?
Carsick Car Shows
I was a non-believer at first, especially because my husband was the one who suggested it (he tried to pawn it off as a date night; therefore, I was unenthusiastic.) It all worked out, and I’ll tell you why.
In the past, we worked with one of the many buy here pay here lots in Indianapolis and had a good experience. We weren’t sure what we wanted this time around and so we were starting from scratch. If one dealer didn’t have what we wanted, we’d be visiting a variety of dealerships.
Dreams of Shiny New Cars
Before we made the rounds at the dealerships, we were able to come up with some ideas on what we wanted. We walked into the car show knowing full well that we wouldn’t be getting anything on the floor. Shiny new cars are pretty to look at and, well, a girl can dream.
As we walked through the exhibitions, our conversation naturally turned to automobiles. I remarked, “the suicide-style doors on a Honda Element looked really functional and I bet that car would be easy for me to drive.” My husband said the installed Sirius XM would let him listen to “any sporting event in the civilized world!”
A few hours looking at products we would never buy made us better consumers. We had a lot of constructive dialog in a no-pressure setting and we had a pool of experts at our fingertips. It was nice not to have to search the Internet and question the veracity of information on Wikipedia. Plus, afterward, I was able to wind down with a nice dinner and an actual date.
So, by the time we went to dealerships, we were able to control the transaction. We knew what we wanted to look at, what we would pay for it and— most importantly, I think— what we wouldn’t touch with a 10-foot pole. All in all, it was a success! We’re looking at buying a house soon, and somehow I don’t think the same approach will work. However, maybe I will go to some fancy open houses; I hear they have cookies at the really classy ones.
The is an awesome Lock-and-Launch rifle system that allows a person the ability to make rifle shots up to 1200 yards away. It looks like it would work. The product releases in a few weeks, I guess we will see what the reviews hold.
We’ll never know when the real Zombie Apocalypse comes, but when it does, it will spread fast! There won’t be any time to go to your local Walmart or Home Depot for supplies because those creatures of the dead will already be flooding the stores and eyeing you as you park your car in the lot. If you think you can simply walk through a crowd of zombies and search through the isles to buy anti-zombie supplies, think again.
As you should have taken note from the Walking Dead series, these bad boys—as dim and slow moving as they may seem—will latch on to you, and start gnawing into your flesh if you get too close! So, the answer is to prepare NOW, before any apparent outbreak of zombies so that you can effectively protect your home from an all out invasion. In addition to food, water, medical supplies and other obvious necessities, here are five must-have items to Zombie Apocalypse-proof your home:
You and your family will be staying busy in the house, preparing food and entertaining the children to keep their spirits up during this scary time of national emergency. TVs and radios will be filled with static and white noise. Phone lines will be disrupted. You will need a way to monitor what’s going on—at least on your street. This is why you will need a surveillance system to track zombies in front of your house. You’ll want to paint the camera enclosure the same color as your house to camouflage it. Zombies may seem stupid, but remember—they were once human like you, and any vivid memory they have of “life” may trigger realizations that could instigate an increase in their level of attentiveness. Be sure to have a family member watching the monitor from inside the house at all times. This way, if you need to make a run across the street for something, you’ll know when it’s safe to run!
You wouldn’t have thought traffic barriers would be a necessity in a Zombie-Apocalypse, did you? After all, zombies aren’t necessarily attentive drivers. However, in a zombie takeover, you won’t be the only one trying to hide. Most likely, there will be other humans out there, driving around your neighborhood, and looking for shelter. Setting traffic barrier devices like retractable bollards in front of your home will send a message to drivers that someone’s home, and will hopefully keep them from crashing into your house while they erratically swerve around, looking for a place to hide from nasty zombies. In addition to keeping other humans away, traffic barriers will hopefully send the message to zombies that there’s no sign of life past the barriers.
Heavy drapes are a primary must! When a neighborhood is infected, zombies will be stumbling through out the block to see if they can catch a glimpse of any live human activity. Even the smallest crack through your home’s exterior can potentially leak traces of human movement and/or light. Heavy drapes will cover these gaps and block this movement and light and keep zombies from noticing signs of life. You can buy drapes, sheeting and other materials at most hardware stores. There are also special online stores that carry industrial-sized drapes if you really need to shield your family from hundreds of zombie attackers.
Wooden boards and nails are your last resort of protection. However, this doesn’t make them any less important. If it does come to the point where zombies are banging on your boarded up door and trying to break into your house, you may need to find another escape route! The nailed-in boards will only buy you a small amount of time to look for other ways out of the house. If the worst case scenario happens and zombie intruders break through, reaching their pale white hands around broken glass and wood to tear down the door, here is what you need to do: quickly run to do the door and rip a piece of wood from the layer of boards. Be sure that the nails are still in tact on the board. Now, you have a “zombie whacking device” that was a door protector! Start whacking away at the zombies with brutal force, and pray that there aren’t hoards more lined up on the street, waiting to enter.
A Zombie Apocalypse is no laughing matter. You must be prepared far in advance for the invasion. Although one single zombie can’t do too much to hurt you on their own, a massive horde of them can easily hold you down and infect you. If you don’t want to become “zombified,” take the necessary steps and pick up the above items from your local electronics and hardware stores. If you come out alive, you owe me one!
Author: Andrew Ortiz Andy loves everything about Miami: The cars, the architecture, the ocean and the fashion. He has a degree in creative writing and contributes to several fashion blogs.